Texts From Last Night

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  (214): View more from Texas

  Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.

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  (214): Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public. http://tfl.nu/c7j6
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that

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  (413): his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that http://tfl.nu/fcpw
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...

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  (817): I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working... http://tfl.nu/rly7
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj

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  (617): anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj http://tfl.nu/74ok
  Replies (76) Good night (6625) Bad night (691) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...

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  (410): pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject... http://tfl.nu/bicl
  Replies (35) Good night (6656) Bad night (648) Order T-Shirt
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  (352): View more from Florida

  all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits

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  (352): all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits http://tfl.nu/ppej
  Replies (37) Good night (5737) Bad night (623) Order T-Shirt
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."

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  (724): the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year." http://tfl.nu/oy1q
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.

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  (724): i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud. http://tfl.nu/ruob
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water

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  (814): Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water http://tfl.nu/ivkw
  Replies (14) Good night (5253) Bad night (976) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.

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  (404): Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore. http://tfl.nu/eu8g
  Replies (18) Good night (4586) Bad night (1749) Order T-Shirt
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  (707): View more from California

  then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"

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  (707): then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure" http://tfl.nu/54yc
  Replies (15) Good night (1204) Bad night (3727) Order T-Shirt
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.

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  (902): In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment. http://tfl.nu/d367
  Replies (10) Good night (2847) Bad night (1005) Order T-Shirt
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  (714): View more from California

  Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.

  (951): View more from California

  Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.

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  (714): Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate. (951): Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day. http://tfl.nu/xq5q
  Replies (5) Good night (1061) Bad night (170)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.

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  (516): I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers. http://tfl.nu/n7z5
  Replies (2) Good night (617) Bad night (504) Order T-Shirt
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  (209): View more from California

  I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat

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  (209): I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat http://tfl.nu/qvh1
  Replies (3) Good night (526) Bad night (169) Order T-Shirt

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