I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
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