when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Everyone says I win the strip club
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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