I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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