We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Randomize
