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• (334): View more from Alabama

  babies were throwing up all over the place

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien

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• (716): View more from New York

  People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz

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• (360): View more from Washington

  I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (519): View more from Ontario

  Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  Now have a vodka water and get your shit together

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood

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• (850): View more from Florida

  I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.

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• (912): View more from Georgia

  I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (586): View more from Michigan

  Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building

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• (509): View more from Washington

  Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.

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• (234): View more from Ohio

  Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.

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• (386): View more from Florida

  At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making

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