are you still at the devil's house?
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
