i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
