hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
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do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
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I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
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