Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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