in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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