I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
