I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
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I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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