i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Everything about him screamed your future.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
