Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.