No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
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