i wish peter jackson would direct porn
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize