i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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