I don't think brook has ever known best
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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