shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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