I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize