Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(813): View more from Florida

mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile

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(813): mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile http://tfl.nu/5jdq

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(602): View more from Arizona

So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.

(480): View more from Arizona

so you punched his junk, right?

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(602): So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex. (480): so you punched his junk, right? http://tfl.nu/9kpg

Replies (16) Good night (716) Bad night (3966)
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(804): View more from Virginia

my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.

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(804): my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go. http://tfl.nu/0t5u

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(937): View more from Ohio

Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.

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(937): Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party. http://tfl.nu/of2q

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(443): View more from Maryland

God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.

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(443): God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse. http://tfl.nu/g7w2

Replies (18) Good night (3904) Bad night (873) Order T-Shirt
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(863): View more from Florida

if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed

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(863): if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed http://tfl.nu/59ub

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(705): View more from Ontario

She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.

(905): View more from Ontario

I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.

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(705): She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that. (905): I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory. http://tfl.nu/dnea

Replies (8) Good night (4609) Bad night (1077)
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(303): View more from Colorado

dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.

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(303): dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered. http://tfl.nu/j70b

Replies (10) Good night (7553) Bad night (950)
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(705): View more from Ontario

You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.

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(705): You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed. http://tfl.nu/gl5z

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?

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(+44): I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone? http://tfl.nu/7opu

Replies (4) Good night (2253) Bad night (807)
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(303): View more from Colorado

he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper

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(303): he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper http://tfl.nu/eza0

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(320): View more from Minnesota

I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.

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(320): I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years. http://tfl.nu/ge1t

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(270): View more from Kentucky

Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.

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(270): Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad. http://tfl.nu/hoxr

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(816): View more from Missouri

Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me

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(816): Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me http://tfl.nu/eiw2

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(817): View more from Texas

apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon

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(817): apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon http://tfl.nu/fh3y

Replies (2) Good night (752) Bad night (149) Order T-Shirt

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