so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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