In the future we'll all be gay
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
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