Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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