Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I FOUND THE LEGS
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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