Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize