How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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