Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I'm at about main and main street
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
