mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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