Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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