dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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