Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(202): View more from Washington, DC

On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US

(703): View more from Virginia

It's the American dream

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(202): On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US (703): It's the American dream http://tfl.nu/z0hb

Replies (31) Good night (4090) Bad night (670)
Favorite
(206): View more from Washington

My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(206): My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury.. http://tfl.nu/rawt

Replies (39) Good night (7917) Bad night (1044) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(816): View more from Missouri

Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(816): Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe http://tfl.nu/ye00

Replies (35) Good night (1132) Bad night (13745)
Favorite
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(610): I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode http://tfl.nu/uv7a

Replies (29) Good night (7015) Bad night (763) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(224): View more from Illinois

get to allyx's house asap

(312): View more from Illinois

Ok is everything ok

(224): View more from Illinois

Yeah, theres just lesbians

(312): View more from Illinois

omg yes on my way

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(224): get to allyx's house asap (312): Ok is everything ok (224): Yeah, theres just lesbians (312): omg yes on my way http://tfl.nu/mxwb

Replies (38) Good night (6765) Bad night (1102)
Favorite
(631): View more from New York

He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(631): He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved. http://tfl.nu/jbvc

Replies (30) Good night (11931) Bad night (1343)
Favorite
(817): View more from Texas

then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(817): then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand. http://tfl.nu/4p59

Replies (6) Good night (1247) Bad night (866) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(563): View more from Iowa

last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(563): last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers. http://tfl.nu/6ciq

Replies (3) Good night (1244) Bad night (681) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(208): View more from Idaho

booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(208): booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday. http://tfl.nu/jn9w

Replies (4) Good night (2100) Bad night (519) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(603): View more from New Hampshire

I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(603): I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST. http://tfl.nu/xkvr

Replies (21) Good night (1845) Bad night (358) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(808): View more from Hawaii

Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(808): Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere http://tfl.nu/w66n

Replies (1) Good night (898) Bad night (447) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(647): View more from Ontario

i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(647): i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night http://tfl.nu/8b8u

Replies (6) Good night (368) Bad night (1170)
Favorite
(812): View more from Indiana

I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(812): I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon. http://tfl.nu/la4i

Replies (10) Good night (835) Bad night (322) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(928): View more from Arizona

You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions

(1-928): View more from Arizona

Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(928): You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions (1-928): Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit. http://tfl.nu/mpos

Replies (1) Good night (610) Bad night (174) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(646): View more from New York

We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(646): We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman. http://tfl.nu/a2vv

Replies (3) Good night (80) Bad night (28) Order T-Shirt

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: