hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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