If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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