tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
