I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
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She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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