why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Randomize
