So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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