i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
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yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
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Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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