I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
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I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
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Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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