You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I'm getting married
To pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize