At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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