Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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