I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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