Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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