I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
