Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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