Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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