i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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